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Yesterday was one of the truly weirder events in Rapid City: the 17th annual Black Hills Duck Race. A fundraiser for the Children’s Miracle Network, this is a water race in which the contestants  coast their way down one-and-a-half miles of Rapid Creek.

Oh, and the contestants are sixteen thousand sunglasses-wearing rubber duckies. 

Yep, hundreds of people run along the creek to cheer on sixteen thousand bespectacled bath toys as they are carried by the creek’s current for a mile and a half.  In triple-digit heat.  You might think that a tad foolish (or indeed suicidal), but then you don’t know the hearty roots of South Dakotans.

The race begins with the 16,000 bath toys deposited in the business end of a massive loader parked on a street overpass directly above the creek.  When the last duck is included, the loader raises its arm and all the folks assembled to watch proceed to count down to the start of the race – ”10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1!” — at which point the loader simply dumps them into the creek.

Ever wonder what sixteen thousand rubber ducks in one place look like?  This:

The ducks then make their merry way down the creek.  Initially working their way downstream in a massive blotch of yellow plastic, the ducks eventually disperse.  Many of the unlucky ones get stuck in the rocks or wander too close to shore, where they get snagged by tree roots and creek grass.  But thousands of others, in some unintuitive display of reverse entropy, neatly align themselves in a near-straight line and proceed in an amazingly orderly procession down the last mile of the trip.

The race ends where the creek passes through Memorial Park in Rapid City.  Partly motivated by the spirit of the race, and partly suffering from heatstroke-induced delirium from the scorching heat, the crowd cheers the ducks on to the finish.

The prize for winning?  Apparently, they are frozen in carbonite and stored in a big cylinder.  I’m not sure what that’s about.

Anyways, I got lots more pictures of this surreal event.  Enjoy.

Karma and I have been having some communication issues lately.

Yesterday, Rapid City was in the middle of a blistering heat wave — just check out the temperature:

Yes, friends, that reads “109^oF.” 

After my badmouthing the unbearable heat of Florida, karma has apparently caught up with me.  Hell, karma has actually caught up with and actually run me over.  Me and my dogma.

Karma made it hot and dry.  So much so, actually, that it actually sparked a brush fire on the hills immediately behind Komplexify U.  It was quickly contained by the brave men and women of the fire department, and thankfully no person or building was harmed.  It did, however, make abundantly clear that it was far too hot and dry for me, and so (not having learned my lesson) I complained about it at great length all day.

Karma struck back: today it rained.  All day.  Big wet fat drops, the kind that smack you with a brick when they hit.  By now I’d smarted up and ceased to complain, and instead stood outside and let the rain pummel me in a fit of precipitorial pugilism.  And lo, the rain ceased, and I spied a rainbow.

And not some namby pamby little segment of prismatic color either.  Oh no.  This was a badass double rainbow, with two full semicircular arcs:

So, yeah, me an’ karma are kickin’ it tight again.  Word.

Compute the following sum:

The solution will be given next week, along with the resolutions to the four paradoxes from last week.

If you keep your eyes open, you can find a lot of unintentionally funny signage out there.  Here are three good examples from this month around town.

Where do you go to clean up the solution to a dirty integration problem?

The FTC Laundromat, of course.  And every calc student could use a little comfort.

Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!

This is the registration desk for a summer program at my work.  Hey, we’re a science and engineering school, not a spelling and English school.  Sheesh.

Truth in advertising

This product’s name is actually a pretty good description of its primary function, if you think about it.

After our experience with the mind numbing antics of the clientele at our local video store, the Queen B and I decided to head out to the movies instead.  Flanked by a Pirates of the Caribbean poster on the left and a Cars poster on the right, we settle into line.  Immediately ahead of us at the ticket window is a pair of tweenage girls, repeatedly pointing at various parts Johnny Depp’s face on the Pirates poster and giggling uncontrollably.

The lady behind the counter, who is as ungiddy to be there as the two girls are giddy, watches this display for minute, her face an emotionless display of disdain, which is a pretty neat trick if you can do it.  Realizing that if any monetary transaction is going to occur tonight between her and the giggling tweens, she will be the one required to initiate it, the ticket lady addresses the girls.

“Can I help you?”

The question prompts another bout of giggles.  Finally, one of the girls composes herself enough to talk.  “Umm… hee hee,” she begins.  “Can we, like, get two tickets for, like, ummm…?”

Her mind goes, like, totally blank.  Her friend, sensing impending social humiliation, does the only appropriate thing: she laughs at her.  This causes another fit of uncontrollable giggling.

The lady at the ticket window remains emotionless.

Suddenly, the outgoing tween remembers.  “Oh yeah!  Like, Pirates of the Caribbean.”

The lady at the counter stares at the girls, and then at the 4 foot Pirates movie poster they just spent the past two minutes giggling at.  A pained look crosses her otherwise emotionless face.  She moves forward with the transaction.

“Two tickets for the 10:10 showing of Pirates of the Caribbean.”

The second tween gasps.  “Ten ten?  But isn’t that, like, forever from now?”

The ticket lady indicates the large clock above her, which shows the little hand pointing to the left and the big hand pointing straight down. 

The tweens stare blankly.

“It’s 9:30,” the ticket lady says, clearing up the chronographical mystery.  She further considers her audience and adds, helpfully, “The movie starts in 40 minutes.”

“Omigod!” exclaims the first tween.  “That’s, like, an hour away!”

There’s that pained look again.

On further reflection, the second tween adds, “Gah.  Isn’t there another one?”

“The only other showing tonight is at 9:00.”

The first tween considers this.  “But that’s like, only a half hour from now.  We’ll take two of those.” 

The ticket lady winces again, takes their money and hands them their tickets.  As the B and I step up to the counter to buy our tickets, the tweens pass by, and I hear the following.

“What a bitch.  She was, like, totally trying to scam us into waiting longer.”