02.13.2010
02.7.2010
Ad naseum (Super Bowl edition)
I only watch the Super Bowl for the commercials. (I do something similar with Playboy.) Here are some thoughts I had about them.
Why, oh why did MicroSoft not by the rights to this year’s Super Bowl? How perfect would it have been to have the
SUPER BOWL XLIV
morph into
SUPER BOWL Xbox LIVe
at each commercial break? Well, they’ve still got next year to seize the opportunity, I guess. I can’t think of a worse missed opportunity since “Big and Tall Factory Outlet” failed to sponsor Super Bowl XL.
HO. LEE. SHITE.
The Last Airbender looks like it will KICK. ASS. The bending disciplines look awesome. The glacier looks awesome. The Avatar State looks awesome. Even Appa (who makes a brief appearance in the upper left-hand corner of the screen at the 9-second mark) looks awesome.
If you didn’t see it yet, here it is:
I may have a reason to believe in M. Night Shamalamdingdong again!
During the Half Time show I wandered over to Disney XD to watch the Phineas and Ferb marathon. One of the commercials over there is for a piece of plastic in the shape of a crescent moon, which apparently can be fastened to ones head to “poof” up one’s hair in the general shape of a mushroom cloud, because if it’s the one thing those kids today like, it’s the bee-hive hairdo of the fifties.
It’s called the Bumpit.
I find this funny as hell, s inceI call the crook in my arm my armpit and the crook in my legs my kneepit. Makes me wonder where that bumpit is supposed to be inserted.
After the Super Bowl ended, there were of course the slew of “male enhancement” commercials designed to capitalize on the testosterone-fueled state of the Super Bowl’s target demographic. One of them (for Viagra, apparently) opens with a dude on his way to the doctor for a check-up, whereupon he is accosted by his reflection in a storefront, who demands that he talk to his doctor about getting some Viagra for his erectile dysfunction. “I don’t know,” says the dude, “that’s a little embarrassing.”
My immediate thought was Dude, you’re arguing with your mirror image on a crowded street. Boner pills are the least of your worries. Let’s start with ant-psychotics first.
http://www.komplexify.com/images/hr.jpg
11.22.2009
Trivia
According to the Queen B, who looked this up the American Music Award show she was watching, Jermaine Jackson’s kids are named Junior, Jaimy, Jeremy, Jourdyn, Jaffar, Jermajesty, and Jerfrickingkiddingmeright?
11.18.2009
Wisdom from the Disney Channel
I’m ever more under the impression that everything one needs to know about the Universe can be found by watching Phineas and Ferb. In addition to its central theme of Carpe Diem! and strict adherence to safe engineering principles, one finds geek gems like this one from the episode The Baljeatles:
Phineas: Gosh, Baljeet. Rock and roll isn’t about books. It’s about letting go and having fun. Rock and roll is a way for you to tell the world how you feel.
Baljeet: Feel about what?
Phineas: Expressing yourself. I mean, what do you do when you’re angry?
Baljeet: Math.
Phineas: …Okay. What about when you’re sad?
Baljeet: Math.
Phineas: Happy?
Baljeet: Ma-ath!
Phineas: So every feeling you have makes you want to do math?
Baljeet: I do not know if it is some much cause-and-effect. I do a lot of math. The feelings come and go.
or this one from Vanessassary Roughness:
Vanessa: So I have to find some way to prove to you that I’m responsible. There must be an easier way to earn a car.
Heinz: Well, you know what they say about taking the easy way.
Vanessa: (Exasperated) What do they say?
Heinz: Well I could tell you, but that would be taking the easy way, and you know what they say about that.
Saturday mornings are fun again.
09.8.2009
Whatcha doin’?
Owing partly to the fact that the Ladybug and I spend every evening together right now (the Queen B has evening rehearsals for a play she’s in) and mostly to the fact that it’s on TV twenty-seven hours a day, the Ladybug and I have become a huge fan of Phineas and Ferb.*
* Actually, one of the advantages to having a 3-year-old in the house is that I now have a valid (if not always entirely truthful) excuse to watch cartoons in the presence of the Queen B, viz. “but the Ladybug likes this show.”
If you’ve never seen it, it’s a Disney Channel toon about two stepbrothers (the titular Phineas and Ferb) who counter their daily summer vacation boredom by building ginormous inventions in their backyard with the help of neighborhood kids, much to the irritation of their older sister Candace. At the same time, the boys’ pet platypus steals away to lead a secret double life as a government ”Agent P,” battling nemesis Dr. Doofenshmirtz, the end result of said battle invariably being the simultaneous defeat of Dr. D’s current attempt to spread evil over the tri-state area and the utter destruction of Phineas and Ferb’s current invention at the exact moment their parents arrive home, thereby thwarting Candace’s attempt to “bust them” for their invention. Oh, and they usually sing one or two catchy songs sometime during the day.
Got that?
It’s geeky and anarchic and good-natured, like Futurama without a Master’s degree, or Family Guy with taste. For example, the government agency for which Agent P works is known as the Epimenides-paradoxical OWCA, or Organization Without a Cool Acronym. In another episode, Dr. Doofenshmirtz outlines his evil plan using storyboards, one storyboard of which depicts the outlining of the evil plan using a storyboard that depicts the outlining of the evil plan using a storyboard that depicts the outlining of the evil plan using a storyboard that… well, you get the idea:
Infinite recursion in children’s programming? Awesome. (P.S. You can watch the whole episode here. This gag occurs about 5 minutes into it.)
In yet another episode Agent P teams up with Britain’s top spy, Agent Double-O O. Together, they bust in on Dr. D, with the following exchange:
Dr. D: Perry the Platypus! And who’s your little friend here?
000: I’m Agent Double-O O, of her Majesty’s secret service.
Dr. D: Double-O O? Isn’t that just Triple-O?
000: No, that’s not how you say it–
Dr. D: It spells “OO,” doesn’t it?
000: It’s just Double-O O–
Dr. D: He’s “P” and you’re “OO,” so together you spell–
000: No, they’re not “oh”s, they’re zeros, alright?
Dr. D: I was just going to say “OOP…” looks like I struck a nerve there.
(And you can watch that episode here. This gag occurs about 4 minutes in.)
Anyways, I like Phineas and Ferb, and I’d bet you probably would to.
