When driving home tonight I went by a sign that read
DALE’S TIRED
RETARD CENTER |
I was aghast that anyone would name thier business that, much less think that was a business niche that required filling.
However, before my indignation reached critical level, a noticed I had misread the sign, which actually was
DALE’S TIRE
RETREAD CENTER |
So now I’m in a bit of an existential pickle as to what speaks more to my character — that I was appalled someone would use such terms, or that I subconsciously interpreted the sign like that in the first place?
Hilarious comment overhead between two gamers in the cafeteria:
Yeah, well when I was your age, I had to blow on the games to make them work.
On Sunday, I broke my left pinky toe accidentally slamming it into a corner.
On Monday, I came down with the flu and lost my voice.
On Tuesday, I fell down a flight of stairs on my way to proctor an exam.
At this rate, I may not live to see the weekend.
Q: How do I know I’m giving exams this week?
A: I’ve been getting emails and phone messages from students that never show up to class at all who are angry at my unwillingness to schedule a suite of office hours especially for them immediately prior to the exam to “catch up on what they might have missed.”
Perhaps I’m just grumbly from the irritating students, my throbbing and purple toe, by pounding headache, raspy throat, and swollen vertebrae, but when the hell did The Learning Channel become a twenty-four-hour-a-day celebration of excessive breeding?
This morning I took the Queen B and the Ladybug to the airport so that they could fly to Florida to spend some time with the B’s family. There, we stood and waited while slack-jawed staff at the Delta counter refused to check-in anyone until the very last minute, whereupon they tried (poorly) to ram through all of the passengers ain a single chaotic mess before finally returning to their previous torpor.
I didn’t realize that Delta customer service was modelled on the Delta function.
This morning the Ladybug used the flash on her new camera to wake up at the butt-crack o’ dawn for some extreme close-up pictures:
Of course, she did that so that she could give me a card in which she recorded the following message: [ listen ]
So all in all, I’m calling this Father’s Day a draw.
