Proper Michael: …why didn’t you just call him?

Tr*st*n: Because my new smartphone was on the fritz.  I couldn’t get it to call out.

Proper Michael: What did you do?

Tr*st*n: Fortunately, my old dumbphone was working, so I used that.

Me: Your dumbphone?

Tr*st*n: You know the kind… it doesn’t take pictures or play music or download games.  It just calls people.

Me: Ah.  I’m pretty sure such devices are, in fact, called “phones.”

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