A sphere walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, “I’m sorry, but we don’t serve spheres here.” The disgruntled sphere walks outside, but then gets an idea and performs Dahn surgery upon himself. He walks into the bar, and the bartender, who does not recognize him but thinks he looks familiar (or at least locally similar) and asks, “Aren’t you that sphere that just came in here?” “No, I’m a frayed knot.”

A definite integral walks and orders 10 shots of whiskey. “You sure about that, buddy?” “Yeah, I know my limits.” [CG]

A bar walks into a commutative algebraist.

sin(x) walks into a bar and asks for drink. The barman declines: “We don’t cater for functions.”

Two polynomials walk into a bar. The bartender, a derivative, asks them “Can I take you order?” The polynomials run out screaming “Help! The bartender threatened to kill me!”

Four fonts walk into a bar. The barman says “Hey you, get outta here! We don’t want your type in here.”

An initial condition walks into a bar. The barman says “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

The definite integral joke is modified from a gag told by Courtney Gibbons, of Brown Sharpie fame (and a former student!).