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05.20.09

Thesis advice

Filed under: Academic humor, Animal farm — Travis @

One sunny day a rabbit came out of her hole in the ground to enjoy the fine weather. The day was so nice that she became careless and a fox sneaked up behind her and caught her.

“I am going to eat you for lunch!”, said the fox.

“Wait!” replied the rabbit, “You should at least wait a few days.”

“Oh yeah? Why should I wait?”

“Well, I am just finishing my thesis on ‘The Superiority of Rabbits over Foxes and Wolves’.”

“Are you crazy? I should eat you right now! Everybody knows that a fox will always win over a rabbit.”

“Not really, not according to my research. If you like, you can come into my hole and read it for yourself. If you are not convinced, you can go ahead and have me for lunch.”

“You really are crazy!” But since the fox was curious and had nothing to lose, it went with the rabbit. The fox never came out.

A few days later the rabbit was again taking a break from writing and sure enough, a wolf came out of the bushes and was ready to set upon her.

“Wait!” yelled the rabbit, “you can’t eat me right now.”

“And why might that be, my furry appetizer?”

“I am almost finished writing my thesis on ‘The Superiority of Rabbits over Foxes and Wolves’.”

The wolf laughed so hard that it almost lost its grip on the rabbit. “Maybe I shouldn’t eat you. You really are sick…in the head. You might have something contagious.”

“Come and read it for yourself. You can eat me afterward if you disagree with my conclusions.” So the wolf went down into the rabbit’s hole…and never came out.

The rabbit finished her thesis and was out celebrating in the local lettuce patch. Another rabbit came along and asked, “What’s up? You seem very happy.”

“Yup, I just finished my thesis.”

“Congratulations. What’s it about?”

“‘The Superiority of Rabbits over Foxes and Wolves’.”

“Are you sure? That doesn’t sound right.”

“Oh yes. Come and read it for yourself.”

So together they went down into the rabbit’s hole. As they entered, the friend saw the typical graduate student abode, albeit a rather messy one after writing a thesis. The computer with the controversial work was in one corner. To the right there was a pile of fox bones, to the left a pile of wolf bones. And in the middle was a large, well fed lion.

The moral of the story: The title of your thesis doesn’t matter. The subject doesn’t matter. The research doesn’t matter.

All that matters is who your adviser is.

Sent to me by Dan Curtis.

9 Comments »

  1. That’s so true…!

    Comment by Phill — 05.25.09 @

  2. The true ending is – your mentor is important, not adviser. Yet, you might have been using another word. :-)

    Comment by Dusan — 05.28.09 @

  3. [...] Just a Little Nerd Humor “Thesis Advice” [...]

    Pingback by Rated /b/ Part 11 | G.A.M.E.S. — 09.1.09 @

  4. NO, what matters is a lion in your hole.

    Comment by GFYM — 10.8.09 @

  5. The two rabbits entered the lair to find 3 bears; one was holding the thesis but in a deep sleep of hibernation. The other two bears quarraled with the wolf, the fox and the lion about who was most importent animal in the story, and the rabbit wrote up the thesis eventually. And they all lived happily ever after

    Comment by Theo — 01.7.10 @

  6. No….
    what matters is the lion you do ;-)

    Comment by Eunoia — 01.19.10 @

  7. Holy **** this is awesome

    Comment by AJ — 03.8.10 @

  8. It’s just a story. If one does not work at all, how can he get degree!!!!
    Moreover it is reputation of that adviser also.

    Comment by Mayank — 06.2.10 @

  9. And the next day, there being no more foxes & wolves about, the lion said RAAARRR, I’m hungry, I think I’ll eat you instead.
    And the poor ickle wabby wab wab got et.
    And the lion said yum yum, that was nice.
    This proves the superiority of lions over foxes, wolves & rabbits.
    MORAL OF THIS TALE: Don’t beleve everything you’re told.
    Sieze the advantage while you still have it.

    Comment by me — 07.28.10 @

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