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Error message haiku

Filed under: CS silliness, Harmonic analysis — Travis @

In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with Haiku poetry messages. Haiku poetry has strict construction rules. Each poem has only three lines, 17 syllables: five syllables in the first line, seven in the second, five in the third. Haiku is used to communicate a timeless message often achieving a wistful, yearning and powerful insight through extreme brevity — the essence of Zen:

    A crash reduces
    Your expensive computer
    To a simple stone.

    Chaos reigns within.
    Reflect, repent, and reboot.
    Order shall return.

    First snow, then silence.
    This thousand-dollar screen dies
    So beautifully.

    Having been erased,
    The document you're seeking
    Must now be retyped.

    Out of memory.
    We wish to hold the whole sky,
    But we never will.

    Program aborting:
    Close all that you have worked on.
    You ask far too much.

    Serious error.
    All shortcuts have disappeared.
    Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

    Stay the patient course.
    Of little worth is your ire.
    The network is down.

    The Tao that is seen
    Is not the true Tao -- until
    You bring fresh toner.

    The Website you seek
    Cannot be located, but
    Countless more exist.

    Three things are certain:
    Death, taxes and lost data.
    Guess which has occurred.

    Windows NT crashed.
    I am the Blue Screen of Death.
    No one hears your screams.

    With searching comes loss
    And the presence of absence:
    Your file, not found.

    Yesterday it worked.
    Today it is not working.
    Windows is like that.

    You step in the stream,
    But the water has moved on.
    This page is not here.

    Your file was so big.
    It might be very useful.
    But now it is gone.

This was sent to me by Laura “RuneMercury” H.


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